Game time! What makes you feel safe?

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I’ve come to the conclusion that the need to feel safe is HUGE for a borderline. It probably is even at the very core of the illness. Do you agree?

I spend a lot of my time not feeling safe and figuring out how I can feel safe. When my boyfriend and I go out, I may be clingy. I like to be close to him. I like him to be touching me. If he goes to get a drink or something, I sit very anxiously until he comes back. I’m constantly scanning and observing my environment for threats of danger; mostly dangerous people. I even spend a lot of time thinking of awful things that could happen (I don’t feel like I do this intentionally, but rather that my mind is always on the lookout), and figuring out how I would handle it in case it ever would happen. In general, I think I find the world to be a very dangerous place.

So, let’s make a list and share ideas. What makes you feel safe?

Me:

-My panda bear

-Soft blankets

-Being held (only by certain people. I don’t like being touched by just anyone)

-Hot chocolate (possibly any warm drink)

-Scented candles (especially with scents like apple pie or warm spice or pastry smells)

-Chocolate or yummy desserts like warm cherry pie with vanilla ice cream..MMMMM!

-Bubble baths with LOTS of bubbles

-Sweatshirts

-Laying surrounded by lots of pillows and blankets while watching Food Network

-Some music

-Kid movies

 

I’ll end it there. How about you?

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5 thoughts on “Game time! What makes you feel safe?

      1. My wife, by her own admittance and by all available empirical indications, couldn’t boot up a computer with a gun at her head.
        It’s a shame, because she is so unabashedly and unashamedly open about her “Mental Illness” (which I put in quotation marks precisely because that is how she acknowledges it) and could be a true, pure inspiration to those who are starting on a path that is agonizingly familiar to her.
        Then there’s the matter of typing, which she can’t, but….

        … tell you what, and this is something I wouldn’t put out there to just anyone:
        I could ask her if she would consider a Skype visit with you should you ever need a voice or a face or a mind or a soul you could easily relate to.
        I’ve always thought she’d be a really cool “kooky ol’ flower-child auntie.”
        And she and I and you know sometimes it’s easier to swap horror stories with someone who has no connection to them.
        Especially when it doesn’t involve co-pays.

  1. – my teddies, or my boyfriend, or sometimes both

    – Food Network! (As long as it’s not Bitchin’ Kitchen, I can’t stand that show)

    – icecream

    – snugly baggy clothes, as long as no one sees me… (The supermarket doesn’t count as being seen)

    – my iPad games: Monument, Tengami, Zen Bound 2, Osmos HD.

    – arts and crafts.

    – cooking.

    – being safe in my boat

    – hot water bottles and onesies.

    – routines help.

    – makeup, especially if I’m going somewhere scary.

    – meditation music

    – some kid’s movies (that surfing penguin film is awesome!)

    1. Sometimes I feel like we are a lot of like. I LOVE Food Network and I hate that show too, btw. It’s the only show on that channel that makes me change the channel! Lol Thank you for the other ones, too! Onesies kick butt!!!

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