I’ve come to the conclusion that the need to feel safe is HUGE for a borderline. It probably is even at the very core of the illness. Do you agree?
I spend a lot of my time not feeling safe and figuring out how I can feel safe. When my boyfriend and I go out, I may be clingy. I like to be close to him. I like him to be touching me. If he goes to get a drink or something, I sit very anxiously until he comes back. I’m constantly scanning and observing my environment for threats of danger; mostly dangerous people. I even spend a lot of time thinking of awful things that could happen (I don’t feel like I do this intentionally, but rather that my mind is always on the lookout), and figuring out how I would handle it in case it ever would happen. In general, I think I find the world to be a very dangerous place.
So, let’s make a list and share ideas. What makes you feel safe?
-My panda bear
-Being held (only by certain people. I don’t like being touched by just anyone)
-Hot chocolate (possibly any warm drink)
-Scented candles (especially with scents like apple pie or warm spice or pastry smells)
-Chocolate or yummy desserts like warm cherry pie with vanilla ice cream..MMMMM!
-Bubble baths with LOTS of bubbles
-Laying surrounded by lots of pillows and blankets while watching Food Network
I’ll end it there. How about you?