I want my klonopin back. It was the first and only medicine I’ve ever had (excluding Ambien for sleep), that I ever felt really helped and wasn’t habit forming. I loved most of all that I could take it when I needed it and wasn’t required to take it daily. I suck at daily medications and I never want another one of those. I only need something that I can take when I need it. When the moment hits. Something to take the edge off so I can use my skills to get through it.
Klonopin did that. It was great. I hardly really took it. Only when I had really bad anxiety over something or when I felt an episode coming on. It didn’t cure it or make it go away, but it did slow me down so I could work through things better. When an episode is coming, everything inside me is racing, so that step on the brake was helpful.
I wish I had that. I think if/when I find a therapist again, I’m going to ask. I always worry about asking for medication. I’m worried they will think I’m just some med-head trying to fake needing therapy to get prescriptions. So I tend to never bring it up so they don’t think that, but the truth is, I need some. I’d like to have my ambien back. I don’t even want to take it daily. I only want it for when I am having trouble sleeping for a few nights and am getting backed up on sleep. I can take it one night just to sort of get me through with some solid sleep. Like now.
Ambien and Klonopin. If I had to pick, I just want my Klonopin back 😦