Rejected

I’m stuck in ridiculous traffic right now and feel like I’m going to die. I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to watch this movie with me and he said “idk. I mean you can watch it but I might just play cards on my phone or go do paperwork”.

I’m sick to my stomach. My heart is beating so hard I feel like I’m going to puke it up.

I don’t know what to make of it and I am panicking. Help.

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3 thoughts on “Rejected

  1. Hello.
    I can understand why you are panicking; it is not irrational to think that someone might leave you as people leave people all the time and there is no way to be certain, we can only accept someone’s love on faith, but we need some evidence too.

    That your boyfriend would prefer to do paperwork than watch a film with you sounds really rejecting but I know from myself that I can be really in love with someone and still want to spend time doing my own thing; I need space to be me rather than us and it never means that I’m feeling less in love.

    I wish that I could somehow prove to my loved one that I can be trusted but I can’t; it’s not provable but I hope over time that the amount of evidence will stack up in my favour.

    I read this recently and found it helpful, it’s probably old news to you but I found it helpful.

    https://lifeinabind.com/2014/08/09/faith/

    M
    x

  2. This is often a feeling I get and it’s insufferable. I know my boyfriend loves me and loves being around me- when I’m having a good day. Bad days, he still loves me and wants nothing more than to be with me but I don’t feel it or see it. In turn, I push him further. Last night he was tired and I assumed he was sick of me but I wasn’t going to let him get away that easy and I put a laceration so deep it landed me in the ER with 12 stitches and a room full of cops. He never did get the sleep he needed.

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