I don’t have a title for this one. It’s just me putting some thoughts onto some virtual paper.
My boyfriend and I broke up. I broke up with him. The pain and stress I go through was just too much to handle anymore and it was the only way I knew to get rid of it. To my knowledge, he didn’t do anything wrong but the triggers I’ve had and my paranoia, it’s hard for me to not paint him as evil.
It’s hard to be around him. When we are just being like friends I can mostly handle it but when there is a glimpse of something more it freaks me out all over again.
I’m not sure what I’m thinking and feeling about it because mentally and emotionally I just need a break. So I try not to think about it and focus on the fact that it’s over and I don’t have to worry anymore.
Am I making a dumb decision? Possibly. Will I one day regret it? Who knows. Maybe, maybe not. Will I be ok? Yes. I think so. Relief is my goal. It’s unfortunate but that’s my reality.